1979 Lincoln Mark V - White Trash with No Cash

When I was growing up on Long Island, New York in the '70's, when people on the North Shore wanted to show off, they did so by having a Mercedes-Benz like this 1979 450SL in their driveway. Whether or not they could afford it didn't matter. On the Gold Coast, appearances meant everything. 

If you lived on the South Shore like I did, if you wanted to give the impression you "had it", again, didn't matter if you did or not, you drove a Lincoln Continental Mark V. Like our Benz, this one is a '79 too. 

Back in the day, nothing said "Long Island" or white trash with cash quite like a Continental Mark V. If we're being honest, and why wouldn't I be, this trashy kid still goes a bit weak in the knees when he sees one of these. Then as now, I'm all about that hump on the trunk. 

Even if there was no point to the hump on the trunk, these warmed-over Ford Thunderbirds meant you were a man or woman who was large and in charge; both literally and metaphorically. My father wouldn't give a Mercedes-Benz the time of day let alone some dinky two-passenger job from Germany, having been corn-fed by the Big Three that bigger was better and double up on the cream cheese while you're at it, give that man a Mark V. Not that he could have afforded it. 

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What's interesting about these cars, which are comically huge and utterly ridiculous, they don't do anything well and, in many cases, do things poorly. Most certainly, they didn't do anything better than the far less expensive 1972-1976 Ford Thunderbird they were loosely based on. It's not like we woke up yesterday and realized that these ostentatious, pretentious, statement making driveway ornaments were sucky cars either. What was bad then is worse now. Back then these cars handled poorly, they were slow, ergonomically awful and got single digit fuel economy. 

Unlike today's do-everything-well luxury sports coupe, newsflash, none of the Big Three make anything comparable to this today, these cars weren't about performance but rather comfort and isolation. And, of course, making a big old statement. 

This popped up on Marketplace recently and for a second and a half, made me think twice about my recent purchase of a 1991 Chevrolet Corvette convertible. Don't judge, but I've always loved these cars, there'd be buy in from the wife since her dad had one or two and its asking price is around two-thousand dollars less than what I paid for my Corvette. Ah, the chill of buyer's remorse. 

Given the opportunity all over again, had this popped up on Marketplace before the Corvette did, would I have pulled the trigger on this and not the Corvette? I can say with full conviction, "no", I would not have. 

Here's why. After the novelty of having bought it wore off, I'd be stuck with an underpowered, wallowing four-wheel barge with even less resale value than my '91 Corvette. I'd also have to modify my garage so the 19-foot-long behemoth would fit in it. Now, if I could have both? Different story. Like that's going to happen.  

While I still love these cars, having had several "classics" from the '70's that were lovely to look at, they were, at the end of the day, boring to drive. To each their own but I've grown to want more from my "oldies" than something that looks good. My '91 Corvette is a blast to drive in addition to being, my blog, my opinion, drop dead gorgeous. It can run circles around any late '70's Mercedes too. 

There's only 48,000 miles on this car but she's far from perfect. Paint shows better in these photos than it actually is, her Y-pipe is cracked, it still has her original belts and hoses. Remarkably, the AC blows cold. Under the hood, all '79 big Lincoln's were saddled with Ford's 400 cubic-inch, two-barrel "Cleveland" V-8 making 159-horsepower. 1977 and 1978 Mark V's with the 460 were no power houses, these would be even slower. Interior is cloth, not leather. Points off there too.  

If there's any advantage to growing older, if you're lucky, you gain wisdom and the ability to be introspective. Looking at my life through a wide-angle lens, when I look at this car, I mean, really look at it, I deduce my nostalgic pangs aren't for the car itself, but for my dream filled, full of optimism youth. I miss the way I used to look at the world, full of hope for the better. You know what? Things worked out pretty good. 

I still may kick the tires on this blue bomb for no other reason than to sit in it and try to imagine that kid from the South Shore pressing his fat face against the window trying to get a glimpse at how the other half lived. 

Collector Series. Moonroof, Factory AmFm 8track CB. Thermometer mirror. MARTI Report ,Window Sticker 48000 miles. Original belts and hoses A/C works as well as all power options. Paint looks good with some clear coat checking and fading on the trunk. Has exhaust leak on Y Pipe. Tires good. Vynil top is excellent. Please do not waste my time or your time if you’re not serious or don’t have the money, or ask is it still available.

 

1986 Oldsmobile Cutlass - Will I Ever Learn?

Well, here we go again, Another 1980's, General Motors' "G-body" coupe. This time it's a 1986 Oldsmobile Cutlass Supreme. Will I ever learn? 

If you graduated high school between, say 1980 and 1988, or thereabouts, chances are a GM "G-body" coupe, before 1982 they were "A-bodes", was on your short list of cars you wanted. That meant either a Buick Regal, a Chevrolet Monte Carlo, Pontiac Grand Prix or, in my opinion, the best looking of the bunch, an Oldsmobile Cutlass like this. Cadillac, oddly enough, never got a "G" or "B" or whatever.  

My problem was. back then, not only were these expensive to buy but they cost a small fortune to insure. Since they were so popular, they were always near the top of the "most stolen" list; chop shops wanting them for parts. Especially since so many of their parts were interchangeable. That drove up insurance premiums up and out of my universe. 

And people wonder why I kept my janky, 1975 Chrysler Cordoba as long as I did. The insurance on anything nice like a newer or less old Olds Cutlass would have left me with no beer money. Priorities. 

Our "Cutty" here is part of GM's 1978 downsized A-body intermediates. A 1981 styling update transformed the coupes into something remotely presentable; the wretched sedans remained the same. The wagons remained unchanged; for some bizarre reason I have less disdain for them. 

The problem with these cars, then and more so now, was, he says sheepishly, head down looking at the ground, they weren't very good cars. Handling was better than on what they replaced, that wasn't saying much, but in fairness, it was just ok even by the loosey-goosey standards of the day. Even ones with sport tuned suspensions were hardly sports cars. They were built on the cheap, they broke frequently, interior ergonomics were a joke, space efficiency was atrocious, especially in the back seat. 

Yet every time I see one, I swoon like a sophomore for Suzie Cream Cheese What's Her Name, the senior cheerleading captain. Then I drive one and I'm like, the hell was I drinking? Well, what didn't I drink back then but much like dating Suzie, these cars are all fluff, no stuff. Oh, look! Another one. 

 

1975 Oldsmobile Omega - Sentimental Timepiece

Has to be at least 25-years since I've seen an Oldsmobile Omega. This '75 popped up on Marketplace the other day for sale east of Cleveland, Ohio and I had to take a closer look. Asking price is $4,750, knocked down from $8,000.  

A problem with Marketplace is your original asking price is still in the ad when you reduce it. I recommend when people drop the price on whatever they're selling, they delete the ad and relist it.  This way you don't look desperate. Unlike real estate listings, the original price won't be on the ad and people like me won't be like, "$8000 to $4,750? What's up with that? And if they go down to $4,750, how low will they go?" 

The more I look at this thing, have to wonder how in the world they came upon that original asking price. Even the reduced asking price is pie-in-the-sky. NADA high retail is $3,750. This is an Oldsmobile Omega not a Cutlass. 

This was bought brand new by the poster of the ad's late grandfather, so I get there's some sentimentality here. Perhaps they're blind to the issues it has or, seeing it's a fifty-years old car, they think this is more than just another old car. 

Reality check. It's just another old car and one that's a "badge engineered" Chevrolet Nova with the standard Chevrolet sixer. Now, if this had the Oldsmobile 350, this would be a different story. Upside, at least it doesn't have the Olds 260 V-8. 

What concerns me most, though, is the rust. And this just what we see. Hopefully, there are no issues underneath, but we are talking about a car that has apparently spent its whole life up here on the North Coast. 

Oldsmobile introduced their version of the Chevrolet Nova for model year 1973. Different front- and rear-facias, bit nicer interior, optional Oldsmobile V-8's and, voila. "Omega". Otherwise, these were all Nova. Buick had a "Nova" as well starting in 1973, something they called "Apollo" they renamed "Skylark" from 1975 to 1979. Pontiac had a Nova starting in 1971, what they called "Ventura" that became known as the "Phoenix" from 1977 to 1979. 

Even Big Daddy Cadillac had one. Well, technically. GM started with the Nova's foundation and built up their 1976-1979 Seville from there. 

What's to become of this sentimental timepiece? Good question. The reduced asking price is steep for a six-cylinder car that has rust issues and has a shredded front seat. Good luck finding someone to fix the rust and hopefully it's just on the body. If the frame is soft anywhere then all bets are off. Poster of the ad says the engine was rebuilt, I'd have tossed it for a SBC Chevy but that's just me. I think this well bought the closer you can get it to two-grand, maybe twenty-five hundred. Seller may think you're a low baller, but they'll come around. Drop a cheapie crate engine in her, shorten the rear end and you've got a fun little runner. These things handle great and even with unboosted drums all around, stop well too. 

 

 

1946 Chevrolet Fleetmaster - The Chevrolet

I wish I could find my parents photo album that had black and white pictures of them on their honeymoon in 1950 up in the Adirondacks. In several of them, they were posed next to my father's gleaming, seemingly black although it was dark green, 1946 Chevrolet Fleetmaster. "The Chevrolet", as my mother referred to it, looked very much like this shredded '46 for sale on Marketplace in Baltimore, Maryland for $5,500. 

My parents lived in Jackson Heights, Queens after they returned from their honeymoon and I can only imagine what it must have been like for my father to slog that big heap around those tiny, traffic clogged streets. No power steering or brakes, and a manual transmission? Air conditioning? Please. At least it had hydraulic brakes but those were "brakes" in the loosest sense of the word. 

Many automobile conveyances and features we take for granted today, not to mention we don't even call "modern", trickled down to Chevrolet through General Motors pricier divisions in the early to mid 1950's. Chevrolet's first automatic transmission, the two-speed "Powerglide" debuted in 1950, power steering in 1953. What are referred to as "power brakes", they're not "powered" in the literal sense like many systems are today but rather vacuum assisted, debuted in 1955. Air conditioning as a factory installed option came out in 1955 as well, the Chevrolet V-8 came out in '55 too. 

So, by the time little old me came around in 1964, the development of the automobile had all but peaked. Subsequent upgrades all but refinement of what had already been invented. Think about it, name a single, significant automobile invention that came out after 1955. Go ahead and Google it. I'll wait here. 

Styling wise, beg to differ all you want, but as big a fan of GM styling as I am, through my foggy goggles, Harley Earl, the famous head of General Motors design and his team "lost their way" starting in the laste '30's and didn't get it back until their first post war models came out in 1949. GM styling really hitting its stride again from 1955 through 1972. 

Sorry, mom and dad, you may have looked great in those photos, but I've never been a fan of, "The Chevrolet". 

I'd love to see what someone does with this car, I want nothing to do with it for a number of reasons. Again, I don't care for cars of this era, and my personal ship has sailed on taking on hopeless basket cases; damn, she needs everything... Fifty--five hundred? Really?  Poster of the Facebook Marketplace ad says there's quite a bit of body filler in it, there's rust, carburetor is shot, 6-volt electrical system needs work, it leaks oil and on and on. 

1988 Cadillac Brougham - A Throwback...But to What, Exactly?

From the Oldsmobile V-8 Diesel in 1979 to the 1980 humpback Seville, 1981's V8-6-4 to the Cimarron and "HT4100" engine in 1982, to the stubby and clumsy Fleetwood, deVille, Eldorado and Seville in 1985 and 1986, Cadillac's missteps in the late 1970's and through the '80's are the stuff of domestic auto industry legend. Even keeping the old school "Fleetwood Brougham" around back fired on them. Our blue subject here is a 1988. 

For the record, this car is technically not a Fleetwood Brougham. In 1985 and 1986, Cadillac had two Fleetwood models in showrooms; the new-for-1985, front-wheel-drive sedan and these "old school", rear-wheel-drivers. To abate confusion, from 1987 through 1992, Cadillac dropped the "Fleetwood" pre-fix on these cars making them simply, "Brougham". Same car, same wrapper, slightly different name. If you think that sounds a little wonky, well, such was Cadillac in the 1980's. 

GM's plans, originally, were to push the old boat out to pasture in 1985 with its stablemates, the rear-wheel-drive Buick Electra and Oldsmobile 98. Both of those cars were replaced in 1985 with front-wheel-drive models similar to the new Fleetwood (and deVille). 

No doubt some wise old sage had the foresight that some of Cadillac's super-core customers might be off-put by the new-fangled and demonstrably smaller, models. So, while the old rear-drive deVille went to the onion field, the Fleetwood Brougham soldiered on. 

That decision, arguably the only smart thing Cadillac did in the 1980's, was a double-edged sword. While these cars sold reasonably well, some years accounting for more than fifth of Cadillac sales, they inhibited the brand's long term growth; "Yuppies" wouldn't be caught dead in one of these. Well, seeing how limousine builders loved the commercial-grade version of this car for their meat wagons, that would have been the only way they'd be caught in one.  

In fairness, though, much like when our lives seem to suddenly go off track, there were plenty of signs of Cadillac's decline. Us fans of the brand chose to either ignore them. 

Going back as far as the late 1950's, GM bean counters began strangling Cadillac's engineering budgets, innovation as much as styling the bedrock that made a Cadillac a "Cadillac". By the late 1960's and especially through the 1970's, there was little tangible difference between, for instance, a Cadillac and a Chevrolet Caprice. The Caprice the better buy as well. Same goes for the Pontiac Bonneville, Olds 98 and Buick Electra. 

Timing being everything, GM willfully decided for Cadillac to be less than it was just as the far tonier,  refined and more expensive luxury imports began getting a foothold here. The rest, as the cliche goes, is history. 

The Facebook Marketplace ad for this '88 "Brougham" pitches this car as being "old school" and a "throwback". A throwback to what, though? To the bad old days when Cadillac wasn't anywhere near what it had been in decades prior? 

 

 

1932 Ford Roadster - Happy Days

Jimmy Comstock was one of the older, car-crazy gear heads in the neighborhood I grew up in back on Long Island, New York in the '70's. While the other guys in that raggamuffin group had first-gen Camaro's, Chevelle's and Mustangs, one had a '52 Plymouth, Jimmy had a '32 Ford "hot rod" similar to this '32 Ford. 

While I preferred the more contemporary cars the other guys had, there was something about Jimmy's funky, rusty, loud and obnoxious, brute force, throwback car I found fascinating. 

The term "hot-rodding" is a broad term but in its purest sense it's where an old car is built or rebuilt using discarded or junkyard parts into something it was never intended to be. While tinkerers and shade trade mechanics had been building their own cars since the earliest days of the automobile, I have no idea what the impetus of Jimmy's car was, the practice really took off during the Great Depression as a less expensive alternative to buying a car. In the years immediately following World War II, since cars were scarce, many G.I.'s built their own, some "hopping" them up into serious, and dangerous, speed machines. 

Building your own car, can you imagine? Contrary to what some say, some things do in fact change. 

This '32 was originally "rodded" back in the early '60's and as of 1964, hasn't had much of anything done to it. That's pretty cool in and of itself. Therefore, this is not unlike the TV show "Happy Days", an old nostalgia piece that's not as old as it may seem. At first. With it's chopped top, shaved door handles and "frenched" door hinges, this thing is more of a '60's hot rod scene time capsule than a climpse into what a 1932 Ford was all about. 

That '60's ethos continues under the hood where there's a period correct, GMC "4/71" supercharged, 283 cubic inch Chevrolet small block V-8 bored out to 301 CID. The GMC 4/71 supercharger was originally a truck exclusive, but engine builders found they could adapt them to other engines including the Chevrolet V-8. Four Stromberg 97 "two-throat" carburetors sit on top of it. 

Small block Chevrolet's were a favorite of builders in the early '60's because they were small, lightweight, robust, abundant and easily modifiable. Ford flathead V-8's, which this car may have come from the factory with originally, were popular with hot rodders as well, but they had their limitations. The 1954-1964 Ford Y-block had its challenges as well. These days, most of these types of cars, some built from kits, would have a Chevrolet Big Block or the ubiquitous GM "LS" V-8. 

No doubt there's plenty of oomph to this thing although shifting gears through the floor mounted, unsynchronized, 1939 Ford three-speed is not a job for the weary. The proverbial rock crusher that along with un-boosted steering and brakes, school bus like driving position and bouncy suspension making this a handful and a half to handle. I doubt this has seen an expressway in decades. 

Ah, the charms of older cars; you've been warned. I almost feel bad for Jimmy Comstock seeing his jalopy was his daily driver. 

Our '32 here is a bit unusual in that the builders kept its fenders, running boards and bumpers on: Jimmy's had had them removed. Many rodders tossed them to save weight. Their very tall rooflines often chopped giving them that sinister and classic "highboy" look. 

"Highboys" ride on their frames like they did from the factory as opposed to "lowboys" whose bodies have been modified to ride around the frame of the car or sometimes between the frame rails. 

This car was featured in the March 1964 edition of American Hot Rodder and a show winner at the "Autorama" in 1963. All that substantiate its $90,000 asking price? Me thinks but what does this kid who grew up on Long Island in the '70's know about these things. 

I have no idea what ever happened to Jimmy Comstock's car. 

 

1987 Honda Prelude Si - Gravy on the Cake

I set my maximum price filter on my latest "cheap car" search on cars.com recently at $20,000 and this 1987 Honda Prelude Si came up in my net. Not unusual. What was unusual, odd in fact, is that it came up near the top of the list when I sorted by "highest price". 

I figured it had to be a super low-mileage barn find. Not quite. While it has only 54,000-miles on its thirty-eight-year analog ticker, I don't believe that warrants its suck your eyes out asking price of $18,000. Now, Prelude Si's of this vintage have sold recently for more than $24,000 at auction, but those had less than 5,000-miles on them not some 54,000. 

I'm of the old-car school of adage that 1980's cars, foreign or domestic, ain't worth squat. Sure, there are a handful of domestic pony cars that command a decent dollar, GM "G-bodies" in good condition too but I wouldn't use those as a daily; they're not reliable and they're terrible on gas. Forget German cars, even some Porsches, you can get them cheap enough, but they'll burn you alive in repair costs. Because they're so well built, Japanese cars from the '80's make some sense as a daily driver but you have to "buy them well". That meaning inexpensively.

Paying too much negates any value proposition. $18,000 is a good chunk of change and I'd just as soon use it on something less old and more contemporary or older with better appreciation upside. This '87 Prelude, while providing a surprisingly modern road-going experience, aesthetically, hasn't stood the test of time like, for instance, Preludes from the early 2000's have. Your opinion may vary, see dealer for details. 

Another thing to keep in mind is getting this insured for what you paid for it will be a tough putt. Classic car insurers like Haggerty don't insure everything "old" and they have limits on how much you can use your classic too. A "State Farm" is going to give you "book" if it gets totaled. Again, this ain't worth really anything. Buyer beware. Call your broker before you head to the bank. 

Honda had already established more than toehold in the United States when they introduced their first semi-Accord based Prelude in 1979. A somewhat sporty 2+2, what the Prelude featured superior fuel economy and build quality, always important attributes but particularly so in the darkest days of the Malaise Era. The fact it performed decently was gravy on the cake. 

Honda really got it right, well, performance wise anyway, with their second generation, 1983-1987 Preludes. These things, while not as powerful or fast as a V-8 powered Chevrolet Camaro, Pontiac Firebird or Ford Mustang, could run circles around them, sip gas and stay bolted together better long after the payment coupons were all filled out. 

Again, where they came up short was aesthetically. Sorry, this little guy is pretty homely. And that it's "resale red" does it no favors either. 

After five-generations, each one seismically better than the prior, Honda pulled the plug on the Prelude after 2001. Made sense since their Accord coupe, especially the V-6 models, were such ringers and having two coupes in a day when coupe sales were lagging, wasn't a best practice.  

What's a fair asking price? Hard to say. Others of this vintage on cars.com right now are in rough shape and have much higher mileage and are priced around $3,500. Still, given the mileage, condition and that it's a Honda, I'd offer no more than ten thousand for it. Seeing the high asking price, you'll get rejected as a low baller which is fine. 

Spend your money elsewhere. Keep looking and good luck!