There are several automotive styling touches or details that I absolutely abhor. I'll stop at dropping the "H bomb" but know that I'm just being polite by not doing such. For starters, let's begin with the color green. I have never seen a car in green, regardless of the shade, that does a car any good. What's worse, green cars, especially those from the 1970's, tended to have matching interiors. While I might warm to a Kelly green, milky, sickly, pea soup vomit green, like on today's subject is the worst of the worst.
Secondly, fender skirts, especially on "smaller" cars. While these 1973-1977 GM "A body" colonnades certainly are not small, they are "smaller" than GM full size, "C" and "E bodies" of the same vintage. Fender skirts, the removable panels on the lower part of the rear fender or quarter panel, work to a some degree on full size cars giving them a somewhat streamlined look. The downside of them is increased visual bulk. And if you've ever had to change a flat and had to remove a rusted on skirt, like people who start scanning groceries before you've finished bagging, you want a special place down below for the design staff who came up with this design cue. I blame the design staff because no self respecting engineer would ever say, "hey, y'know...let's put fender skirts on it...".
Another faux pas; white walls on "mag wheels", "mags" with white walls and "mags" on a "luxury car. No, please. Just don't do it. Fail. This car should have shiny aluminum wheel covers and not the legendary Pontiac aluminum rims. Black walls and raised white letter tires don't work either; like Crager rims on Cadillac. Again. Please, no.
Finally, vinyl roofs or tops, especially landau or half vinyl tops like what our subject has. I get what vinyl tops where supposed to be; simulated convertible tops. The "pre" '73 A body hardtops could kind of get away with a vinyl top, but the '73-'77 colonnades? Draw your own conclusions. I've already drawn mine. For the record, I've removed vinyl tops from cars because I despise them so.
Finally, these big, not a design cue but federally mandated, "5 mph" bumpers. I remember seeing commercials for cars in the early '70's and being in awe of a car's ability to absorb amazing impacts because of the shock absorber protected bumpers and front fascias. Great. However, you would think that with the amount of time that designers and engineers would've had prior to 1973, they would've done a cleaner job of blending the bumpers into the overall design of the car. Some cars of the era do look better than this, especially the similar Grand Am but by and large, like on our Grand LeMans, fail.
The mid 1970's where a tough time for the American automobile industry. What with the perfect storm of government mandated safety and emissions regulations and the punch in the face of the first gas crisis, even mighty GM was sent reeling. Reeling around dazed and confused coming up with cars like the Pontiac Grand LeMans.
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