1996 Chevrolet Camaro - Service Engine Soon. Again.

I've been using the older of our two 1996 Chevrolet Camaro's as a daily driver lately and I was amazed and impressed with how trouble free it was and how well it was running. The car is great on gas, handles like a slot car and is cheap to insure; living life frugally has never been more fun. 

No sooner did I think that that the engine began sputtering intermittently and the ominous "SERVICE ENGINE SOON" warning, the precursor to the check engine light, started coming on every now and then as well. Thinking the sputtering was nothing more than a failing coil pack, I waited until it got worse before I did anything about it.



As the sputtering increased and the SERVICE ENGINE SOON light started staying on all the time, I went to Autozone, who market they can tell you why your check engine light is on, to borrow one of their scanners. When I hooked it up to the port under the dash, this message,  "P1200 Injector Control Circuit" popped up; the hell does this mean? Damned if I could figure that out with subsequent google searches and the guys at AutoZone couldn't tell me either. Yes. Autozone can scan for trouble codes but it's up to you to figure out what the codes and these obscure descriptions of the codes actually mean. Could be a bad fuel injector, fuel pump, PCM, flux capacitor. Thanks for nothing, AutoZone.

To make matters worse, earlier this week my car left me stranded in the strip mall where I got my hair cut.  It did turn over, thankfully, after about an hour or so during my wait for a tow truck. Once it turned over I canceled the tow and not trusting the car, I dropped it off at Conrad's for the beat down of a $100 diagnostic and the dread that there might be something seriously wrong with the car.

My biggest fear was that the fuel pump was shot which on this generation of Camaro is often times a fatal illness. Replacing them requires either removal of the gas tank, which requires the dropping of the exhaust system and rear axle or cutting a hole in the bottom of the trunk to gain access to it. A lengthy, not fun to do project and a super costly repair to have done.

The next day "Ted" from Conrad's called me and told me that the problem was a failing mass air flow sensor. That's it? Great news! The mass air flow sensor, or MAF, determines the mass flow rate of air entering fuel injected engines and are very simple to replace. When they start to go problems manifest themselves in all sorts of ways - engine sputtering, hesitation, odd shifting. And that's if the car starts at all.  All in to replace this little sucker? Just under $500. It's a fairly pricey part and shops have over head but that doesn't mean I have to pay that. This is where the fun really starts.

Auto repair centers don't like people like me because we tend to use them for information. It's probably why they jacked up their diagnostic fees - they have to make money on us do-it-yourselfers somehow. Problem with doing work yourself after a diagnostic is that once you leave the shop you're on your own.

I bought AutoZone's "Durlast" brand MAF, with a lifetime warranty, for $105. Such-a-deal. I got the car home, popped it in and...and...the car wouldn't start. I pulled it out, inspected it, as if I was going to be able to tell what might be wrong with it, I cleaned the throttle body with compressed air reinstalled the MAF and still, nothing. I called AutoZone and they stood by their product. They said, "sir, highly unlikely our MAF is defective. Have you tried inspecting the relay?"  The relay? Wha? To make matters worse, when I put the old one back in the car wouldn't start either. The hell was I going to do?

Knowing I had screwed up and left Conrad's without having them do the work, I called them the next day and humble as I could possibly come across on the phone,  told them I had replaced the MAF and that my car wouldn't start. "Ted" couldn't have been kinder on the phone and told me that AutoZone's MAF had to be defective. To make matters worse, though, he told me that if I brought the car back he'd have to charge me another diagnostic fee since they'd have no idea what I had done after leaving there without having them do the work. From a lawyerly perspective, that logic was impossible to counter. Ted also suggested I try another MAF.

I bought another one from AutoZone and to my delight, my car started right up. However, on the test drive, it sputtered, hemmed and hawed worse than it ever had before when this problem first started occurring. Imagine my frustration at this point; I'm ready to dump the damn car into Lake Eerie but at least it was running. Running horribly but it was running. Another visit to AutoZone for a scan and they told me I had a cylinder misfire, couldn't tell me which cylinder either, and that the catalytic converter was failing. I love AutoZone's personnel but nine times out of ten they have no idea what they're talking about. I dropped the car back off at Conrad's doing my best to accept the fact they were going to nail me for another diagnostic fee. A painful pill to swallow but what choice did I have?

The next morning Ted called me and told me that he believed the problem was, get ready, a defective MAF. You have got to be kidding me. Incredulous, I pleaded my case and he kindly reduced the diagnostic fee by half. Nice. I then found an AutoZone with five MAF's in stock and armed with the diagnostic from Conrad's that indicated their previous two MAF's were defective, I told them that I was going to try each one of them until my car ran right.

Well, screw AutoZone. I bought a MAF at NAPA instead for $115. NAPA's was a bit more expensive than AutoZone but NAPA is where Conrad's buys their electrical components. I installed it in the NAPA parking lot and my car started right up, ran smoothly and accelerated flawlessly without any hint of hesitation. Hallelujah. I promptly returned AutoZone's latest defective MAF and was on my way.

Immensely satisfied and gleeful at fixing my car and saving more than $300, an hour or two later  my older son called me to tell me that the 1996 Camaro he's driving, remember I have two of them, started exhibiting the same symptoms my car had had. Can't make this stuff up. Well, at least I know now what to do and most importantly what not to do.

When I picked up my car at Conrad's, Ted, who apparently is the store's master mechanic as well as general manager, didn't charge me anything for dropping the car off the second time. That is what I call great customer service. It was the right thing to do but still, all too often these days businesses drop the ball on little things like that. It meant the world to me and now I am a loyal customer. Snaps to you, Ted.