Clearing out my desktop this morning on an old laptop and I came across these few photos I took of what I thought was my most responsible automobile purchase of my life. It's a 2004 Honda CR-V and it turned out very quickly to be the worst automobile purchase I ever made. Thankfully, the story has a fairly benign albeit somewhat interesting ending. It was brief too.
Introduced for sale in the United States in 1997, Honda had been making and selling them since 1996 but strangely a Honda dealer group consortium balked at selling them prior because they thought it would impact Pilot sales, the CR-V was one of the first car-based SUV's. Buyers inhaled them like unsupervised children pounding down pizza, cake and ice cream at a Chuck-E-Cheese too; pre-Covid of course. Folks gobbled them up despite some oddities like a curbside hinged tailgate and a somewhat funky interior layout including oddly positioned power window buttons. Such was the state of Honda years ago that no matter what, "it was a Honda" so it had to be good. Oh, and it was. These things were sweet little trucklettes.
My 2004 here is a first-gen CR-V, which allegedly stands for "crossover recreational vehicle" but it has a 2.4-liter, 166 horsepower engine instead of the dawgish 2.0-liter, 126 horsepower til that plagued the earlier models. This thing hauled like a kid packed with too much pizza and ice cream running to the bathroom. Very surprising. It handles much like the Civic it's based on too with tons of room inside and the proud stance of practicality that I haven't felt since driving a friend's Volvo years ago. No more Chevy Camaro, Pontiac Trans Am or Ford Mustang for me, sir. This boy is sold lock, stock and barrel on a Honda.
Well, I actually bought it for my younger son, the one who could care less about what he drives, and it was to replace the woe-be-gone 1996 Camaro that was demolished when a woman had an epileptic seizure while driving her Lexus GX470 and she plowed into it. She's fine but she totaled four cars including his Camaro. Her insurance company settled with me for over six-thousand dollars. I'm still pinching myself. To make matters better, I spent it wisely, so I thought, on this cute-as-a-button little CR-V.
Whoever said don't judge a book by its cover knew what they were talking about. Just like what I did with my Ford Mustang that I bought, the first thing I did was take it to a mechanic for a looksee under the auspice that anything found wrong would be covered by the dealership. Within reason of course. However, unlike the Mustang that passed with such flying colors that the mechanic who did the inspection wanted to buy it from me, the CR-V flunked. Flunked big time. The culprit was rust. Heavy-duty rust.
I kick myself for not peering underneath that damn thing before I bought it but when I got to the shop where it was being inspected, I could not believe that amount of corrosion it had. You'd never know it either seeing how spic and span the body is. The interior was showroom immaculate too. Rust was everywhere and it seemed literally everything underneath needed an overhaul. Brakes, brakes lines, emergency brake cables, fuel lines, AC lines, even the radiator was leaking because it was rusting out. Tires had dry rot too. The mechanic said it looked like the thing had sat submerged for years; it looked like the sunken Titanic underneath. All fixable stuff, yes, but all in for this thing was going to run me over eight-grand; I bought it for about $4,300. Yeah, I could have done a bulk of the work myself but still, why should I have had to?
Now, to be perfectly candid, I have a pretty bad temper and I'm embarrassed to death by it. Bless my family for putting up with me and on top of that, apparently I have a fairly wicked looking resting disposition that intimidates people. I work on both constantly and most people who get to know me think I'm pretty swell and swell. Again, when they get to know me. I'm usually as laid back and affable as Dr. Jekyll but in situations like feeling like I got taken to the tune of over four-thousand dollars, my "Mr. Hyde" comes out.
I don't remember exactly what I said to the owner of the used car lot I bought the CR-V from but fueled with the erroneous knowledge my wife gave me that all automobile purchases can be returned to the point of purchase within three days, I laid into the guy who sold me this piece of junk good. Real good. And he, thankfully, acquiesced and agreed to give me the check back I bought it with; he hadn't even cashed it yet. That's how short the time period was that I had the vehicle. I also, proudly, did not utter a single swear word as I was getting increasingly livid with him as I read off the laundry list of problems with what he sold me. See? I'm trying. I really am.
I promptly returned it within twenty-four hours of the original purchase and redeposited my money. I later spent a good chunk of it on a 2003 Chevrolet Malibu that my younger son still drives to this day and is quite happy with it. While it hasn't been the sturdiest or most reliable of rides, he's happy w ith it and it's all good in the end.
What's the shortest amount of time that you've owned a vehicle? Comment below. I'm curious. Prior to this I had a car for four months, another couple I had for like nine. Oh, and by the way, there's no law that automobile purchases can be returned in three days in any state. There should be. CarMax and other used car dealership networks advertise that you can return a car within five to seven days but for those run-of-the-mill corner used car lots, no such law, rule or stipulation applies. Buyer beware.
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