Our Four Homes

 

 

In the fall of 1991, in thick in the middle of a deep, dark recession, two crazy kids found the Long Island housing market to be delightfully in their favor. There was no shortage of homes available for us to choose from nor was there a shortage of homeowners willing to negotiate. After several weeks of frantic weekend searches, we found this not even 1600 square foot ranch, 50 miles east of Times Square with a very motivated owner who was relocating to Houston. Built in the midst of the 1979-1980 energy crisis, which itself helped spur another recession, this, at the time, bone stripped, builder's special served us well. The house was not perfect, though. Too small and with no basement, by the time the boys came along we were  bursting at the seams. The best part about this home and the Long Island housing market in general back in those days; appreciation. In the 12 1/2 years we owned this home our initial investment tripled. The challenge was that our investment tripling also meant everyone else's investment tripled.



 

 

Make plans, God laughs. In the blink of an eye, circumstances change. In 2004, I changed jobs taking advantage of an opportunity in "nearby" Connecticut. We bought this "contemporary colonial" in a Hartford suburb and it was everything our Long Island home was not. Twice the size with a walk out (unfinished) basement, two stories (the boys loved that) and loaded with luxurious amentities, we could not ask for more. Of the house. While very nice, Connecticut is nearby to Long Island only physically. The metaphorical differences between Long Island and "Southern New England" are seismic.  After being in the same place for 12 1/2 years, we suddenly found ourselves moving for the second time in a year. To Dallas, Texas of all places.

 

With knees and elbows scrapped from the abortive landing in Hartford, we decided to "buy down" in Dallas. The Dallas housing market is remarkably affordable at least in comparison to homes from the North East. Armed with a wheel barrow of cash, we could've easily "over bought" down there. The homes tend to be out of this world huge. Knowing that and being fully aware of the tender nature of what I do for a living, we thought it best to buy something at least on the modest side by comparison to what a lot of folks down there buy. Always thinking quick resale, we found this 2,500 square foot, "one story home" in a handsome, booming community North of Dallas (Allen) about 20 miles from where I would work. This home was gorgeous inside. 4 bedrooms, spacious kitchen, 3 1/2 baths, a pool, hand scraped wood floors amidst other wonder touches, the only things we wished for was a basement and a tad more room. I also wasn't fond of this mini cul de sac thing and the traffic on the street; we were too close to a major roadway that was only getting busier. We toyed with the idea of relocating within this development to a larger home with more property that lent itself to more privacy. We loved Dallas and never thought we'd leave.

We'd live here a total of five years. I would live here, technically, only three. We were still getting adjusted to life in Dallas when in early 2008, another massive life change occured. My position that relocated my entire family to Dallas for was eliminated. While, luckily, I found work fairly quickly, it was in Nashville and with a company that I was not excited about working for. I moved to Nashville, the family stayed back in Dallas while we tried to figure out what we were going to do long term. I had a small apartment in Nashville near the airport and came "home" just about every other weekend. This dragged on for two, very long years.
 

In March of 2010, I found work in Cleveland, Ohio and I felt confident enough, with the position, that we moved there as a family. We settled in a community about twenty minutes west of downtown Cleveland that, ironically, is a pleasant mixture of all the places we've been. We couldn't ask for more of our home. If you count the massive, finished basement, we have approximately 4,000 square feet, six bedrooms, four bathrooms and a three car garage. The schools here are fantastic, my commute is the best I've ever had, save for my ten minute jaunt to the office when I slummed it in Nashville, I enjoy my job but most importantly, my family is thriving. In Cleveland. Who'd have thunk it?

 

 

We even got a dog.

1954 Chevrolet Pickup - That Rare Exception

 

As a dyed in the wool, washed in the blood "car guy", rarely does a light duty pickup truck get my attention and here's that rare exception. While I still find little to oogle over with this 1954 Chevrolet 3100, I do appreciate that someone does find it not only oogle worthy but worthy enough to sink enough money into it as to ask 20,000 cold hard dollars for it. Y'see, old trucks are just like old cars in that it's best to buy one that's already restored. Even a rust bucket bought at next to nothing will run you easily twenty large to get it into decent shape. That's not counting the initial out lay of cash for the purchase, mind you. Seems to me the person selling this truck is attempting to recoup some of that expense. Yes. It's for sale. Email me if you're interested. It looks flawless and very fresh to me.  

 

Naturally, what something will cost is relative to what someone is willing to pay for it. Some scoff at the Little Red Corvette my wife and I bought ourselves for our twentieth wedding anniversary present to ourselves a couple of years ago. Especially when it's in less than perfect shape and is less than the most appreciative model years being a 1977. "At least it's not a 1980 to 1982", I bark back at people that I smugly dismiss as being jealous. This sixty year old pickup truck at twenty grand? Sheesh. What's more, that's twenty grand for a brutally crude appliance that makes our Corvette seem like a Ferrari 458. That color is horrible too. My iPhone 4S camera doesn't do it's sickly, almost military grade of bland blueish grey justice. It's shiny too just like a new hammer. Is it a coincidence that this thing is in the parking lot of a hardware store?

 

 

Now, many times I'll stop and fumble all over myself taking pictures of an old car and burst with excitement about getting back home to write it up. Just as many times with vehicles like this that I not only have no emotional connection to, there was literally nothing like this where I grew up, little less even liking, I struggle to put words on paper but I find the serendipitous juxtaposition of my Corvette with the truck making for some interesting if not striking conjecture. For instance, is it me or is it hard to fathom that the truck is a mere 23 years older than my Corvette?

 

 

My thirty seven year old Corvette seems almost impossibly modern compared to the ancient lines of the truck let alone how much more advanced it is mechanically. Sorry, that would be a lie. It's really not mechanically more advanced than the truck but if you take a 2014 Corvette and put it next to a 1991 Chevrolet pickup, you're not going to have this same physical juxtaposition. I doubt that there are many people who would look at a light duty 1991 Chevrolet pickup truck, one that's in pristine condition, mind you - haha, good luck finding one of those in Cleveland - and realize that it's twenty three years old let alone acknowledge that the 2014 Corvette is "the new one". Car and truck design having hit a symbiotic plateau somewhere in the last twenty five years making everything that's recently old looks fairly timeless. What's really come a long way is what's underneath. Cars and trucks today are just fantastic.

 

 

I know enough about trucks to tell you that this thing is not for me on any level whatsoever. It's that utter ambivalence that helps me empathize with people who find no interest in my vehicular pursuits. In fairness, I do appreciate some of the finer design details on this truck that are little more than fluff, though. I also wonder how the hood on this thing opens without getting dented by this deliciously delicate rear view mirror. 

 

 

This wooden bed back here is of nicer lumber than my kitchen floor. Was it this way when new? Seeing how much attention to original detail in the restoration there is I have to imagine that it did. Why is it that all of the boards are not of the same width, though? See? That's why I'm not good with pickup trucks; I can't help but wonder why there's any design ethos on something that's supposed to be nothing if not practical. I also find dainty toilets to be equally as perplexing.

 

 

Make him an offer. I won't even charge a finder's fee.

1963 Buick Riviera - She Walks In Beauty

 

She walks in beauty, like the night
   Of cloudless climes and starry skies;
And all that’s best of dark and bright
   Meet in her aspect and her eyes:
Thus mellowed to that tender light
   Which heaven to gaudy day denies.
 

One shade the more, one ray the less,
   Had half impaired the nameless grace
Which waves in every raven tress,
   Or softly lightens o’er her face;
Where thoughts serenely sweet express
   How pure, how dear their dwelling place.



And on that cheek, and o’er that brow,
   So soft, so calm, yet eloquent,
The smiles that win, the tints that glow,
   But tell of days in goodness spent,
A mind at peace with all below,
   A heart whose love is innocent!

George Gordon Byron

1975 Buick Skyhawk - Good Luck With That

The Buick Skyhawk was a subcompact, four passenger, hatchback that was introduced in September 1974 for the 1975 model year. Buick sold it through 1980.  
 

How much is a car worth that's forty years old and in very good condition? What something costs is only as much as what someone would pay for something. It's debatable how much this car would ultimately retail for but the dealership in Florida where it's for sale is asking $6600 for it. Good luck with that.

 

 

This first-generation Skyhawk was based on the Chevrolet Vega and shares its wheelbase and width.^] The Skyhawk was produced with H=body variants Chevrolet Monza, Oldsmobile Starfire, and  Pontiac Sunbird.

 

This would be an interesting driver for a kid who wouldn't have to go too far from home or campus in it. My concern would be getting it to campus in the first place and once there I'd be prepared to make many trips to campus to fix whatever broke. And that will happen a lot. Take it from someone who's been there, there are many cons with going with an old car as a daily driver. Having one that's at the dawn of 40 is really not a good idea. Our 19 year old Camaro our high school senior tools around in is all the hassle I can muster. Can you imagine something that's twice as old and ten times more unique? Unique, at least with regards to old cars, not a good thing.

 

 

This Skyhawk was a rear wheel drive car with a live rear axle. Throughout its production, the H-body Skyhawk would be offered only with the Buick-designed 3.8 liter (231 cid) V-6 using a 2-barrel carburetor that generated 110 bhp.

 

Mechanical parts for this car are a plenty since this Skyhawk is a Chevrolet Vega with the Buick 231 V-6. It's the exterior and interior bits and pieces that concern me. One little tap on the front bumper denting that gentle rubber strip and you're going to be in a hurt of trouble trying to find a replacement. There are no restoration websites out there that you can go to find a rub strip, fender or hatch back glass for a 1975 Buick Skyhawk. Better find a forum of fellow GM H body Skyhawk owners to help you out. Good luck with that too.

 

 

There is no such species of birds known as skyhawks. Best can be said is that the car is named after the Douglas A-4 Skyhawk, a single seat carrier-capable attack aircraft that the U.S Navy and Marine Corp used beginning in 1956.

 

There in lies a big issue with that $6600 list price. After you've laid down what is in essence cheap Corvette money, you could get a decent looking, 1975 Corvette "driver" for similar money, you have a car that while simple to repair, is harder to find parts for than a '55 Desoto. I had a 1978 Dodge Magnum years ago and while mechanical parts were easy to find, I knew that if I had any sort of fender bender with it that I would have a devil of a time finding parts for it. Especially if my network of internet friends couldn't get the parts for me either. Then again, I spent a grand on the car initially so I didn't have that much "in it" to start. Starting at $6600 is a different story.

 

 

Buick stopped production of the H-body Skyhawk in 1979. The nameplate was switched to the GM J-body platform beginning in 1982 and remained in production through 1989.

 

It's not uncommon for people to think that Granny's mint old car, especially one with only 39,000 (undocumented) miles on it, is worth a small fortune but you have to be realistic. Maybe there is someone out there who has been longing for a Skyhawk after all these years to help them relive some high school memories or whatever. I know all too well what that's all about given my taste in old cars but you have to keep your shirt on. I'd low ball at $2500 and go no higher than $4000 for it. Happy shopping and good luck.

 

1976 Oldsmobile Cutlass - Midwestern and Proud Of It

 

The first Oldsmobile Cutlass was an experimental sports coupe designed in 1954. Its platform was quite similar to the later compact F-85, which was not introduced for seven more years.

 

One of the disadvantages of growing up in "Greater New Yorker" is that the area is a giant bubble isolated  from the rest of the country. I had a suspicion this was the case when I stilled lived there but many years post, "the move", (actually several) I realize that I was correct in that assumption. The rest of the country does things one way while New York does it their way. Do they do it better? That's a matter of opinion. I can tell you that New York is so different, particularly Manhattan, that it might as well be a city in another continent.
 

When the F-85 made its debut in 1961, "Cutlass" was the top of the line model.  

Case in point, while the rest of the U.S.A. was buying Oldsmobile Cutlass' in the 1970's and 1980's by the bushel full, making it the number one selling automobile in this country, you'd never know what a strong seller the car was if you lived in the New York City area. Trendsetters or taste makers in New York didn't drive something as bourgeois as an Oldsmobile; they drove Mercedes Benz, BMW's and the occasional Audi. If you are what you drive what did an Olds Cutlass say about you? That you were modest, pragmatic, Midwestern at heart and proud of it.

 

Disappointing sales of the compact F-85, along with the introduction of the mid size Ford Fairlane in 1962 prompted GM to enlarge the compacts for the 1964 model year.

 
Having lived most of the last ten years in the Midwest I can tell you that, for my family at least, life is a whole lot better here than in New York. Better cost of living, better schools, better housing, less congestion and depending on where you are, Cleveland not being one of them of course, better weather.



 

Oldsmobile dropped the Cutlass moniker after 1999. General Motors dropped Oldsmobile after 2004.

 

Friends ask if we'd ever consider a move back to New York and my wife and I are adamant that the situation would have to be pretty darn awesome to make us give up what we have here versus going back there. We have several friends who've made similar moves out of the New York bubble and feel as strongly about the Midwest as we do. Even if the quality of life here in the Midwest means rubbing elbows with people who drive what some New Yorkers would make out to be a less than sophisticated automobile. The trade off is worth it.

 

 

 

 

 

2014 Dodge Viper - Old Guys With Money

Chrysler made some minor headlines the other day when they announced that they were dropping the price on their slow selling Dodge Viper by $15,000. That means a new Viper still stickers for a shocking $85,000.

How slow is Viper selling? Dodge sold just 38 of them in August while Chevrolet sold 2,679 Corvettes. That's incredibly vexing for Chrysler in a market that has seen luxury sports car sales soar by 35% this year. What's more in a new car market that's the best its been in eight years, Chrysler sales over all are up an industry leading 14.3% through August and market share increasing a full percentage point. That's due largely to demand for its stable of trucks and sport-utility vehicles but still, that's impressive growth.

Why are Viper sales so bad? Several reasons the least of which has to do with the physical car; this Viper is awesome.

 

First, the market for high performance, two passenger cars is tiny and at least in the United States, Chevrolet literally owns the market with Corvette. What's more, Viper has to compete with this spectacular new Corvette that offers comparable performance for considerably less money. Even luxury car buyers appreciate value. Well, the ones that have half a clue as to what got them in a postion to have the kind of money it takes to buy one. 

When Dodge came out with Viper in 1992, despite its overall lack of refinement, it was a stronger performing car than Corvette. It's then eye watering $50,000 price tag (Dodge claims the $15,000 price cut on the new Viper puts it in line, adjusted for inflation, with the '92 Dodge Viper) seemed somewhat acceptable given the high level of performance its 400 horsepower V-10 engine provided.  The 1992 Corvette ZR-1 developed similar power to Viper but as for the base Corvette versus a base Viper, Corvette couldn't compete.

That's not the case anymore. Even the base Corvette is now a world class sports car the equal to anything even a 10 cylinder Viper can muster. What's more, buyers of these cars, those stereotypical "old guys with money", unless they're car collectors, usually don't have room for more than one "sports car" and if they did it's debatable if they'd buy a Viper to go along with whatever else they've purchased.

If you're so inclined, get your game face on and go into your local Dodge dealer and make them offer. You might be surprised by the kind of deal you get.

 

 

 

1978 Chevrolet Monte Carlo - Godfather Part 2 This Ain't

In film, a good sequel doesn't require the audience to be aware there was a "Part 1" let alone require of them to have seen Part 1 to appreciate it. Makes me wonder if I would have been as disappointed in the 1978 Chevrolet Monte Carlo had I not have been such an admirer of the car it was based on. Did the masses that bought these cars between 1978-1980 like it for what it was or for what it reminded them of?

The car it was based on, "Part 1",  was the iconic, much lauded and lamented, 1973-1977 Monte Carlo. Part of GM's "Colonnade" series of cars introduced for 1973, the 1973 Monte Carlo was the  most flamboyantly styled of the "Colannades" not to mention Chevrolets offered for sale in the 1970's. Its bulbous and exaggerated lines right up there with another '70's automotive icon, although it was introduced in 1968, the C3 Corvette.

With sales each year never less than 290,000 per year and more than 410,000 in its final year of production, those are tremendous numbers, you can't blame Chevrolet for scribing a 7/8 scale version of it when the corporate mandate came down to put all mid size cars on a diet for 1978.

 

Although only a foot shorter and an inch narrower than the 1973 - 1977 Monte Carlos, the 1978 Monte Carlo appears lilliputian in a side by side comparison. Like someone who's lost too much weight, it looks like somethings not quite right. Those tiny 14 inch wheels don't help either. Wouldn't you know it, though? Taste being like armpits, it sold extremely well.

The 1973 Monte Carlo, again, "Part 1", was an exaggeration of the original Monte Carlo which came out in 1970. The Monte Carlo being Chevrolet's answer to corporate cousin (more like sister or brother) Pontiac's Grand Prix which itself was an answer to the question, "what comes after muscle cars?" The answer was (and oxymoronic at that) personal luxury cars. Or cars that looked luxurious. After all, what's a luxury car above and beyond a conveyance that makes it owner appear to be successful? GM's stylists inspiration for the 1970 Monte Carlo's design?

The "Great Gatsby" or "classic" cars of the 1920s and 1930s. Seeing that 1973 was a mere 40 years or so hence, people in the late '60's and early '70's looked to Great Gatsby cars like the 1928 Rolls Royce as an example of automobilia at its finest. Not unlike the way we admire muscle cars of the 1960s as supreme examples of cars made now not being "what they used to be". Note the fenders, long hood and single, isolated headlamps.

As much as the '73 Monte drew from "classics", another example being this delightful 1932 Dusenburg Model J (note the fenders and how much of the car is in front of the windshield), like a gimmicky hit record, the "Great Gatsby" inspired Monte Carlo became a phenomena above and beyond its inspirational starting point.

  

The 1978 Monte Carlo owes much of its design to The Great Gatsby cars as well if only indirectly. However, by 1978 that concept had been all but forgotten and replaced by what the design had become itself. Like so many sequels, though it didn't live up to the original. Godfather Part 2 this ain't.

 

 

Chevrolet updated the Monte Carlo in 1981 with this much more restrained and cleaner styled model. By 1981 though, the market for personal luxury cars had already begun to shrink. The '70's were over, baby.

 

 

Mattel X-15 - The Pain. Oh, The Pain

 

 The object of my early childhood dreams

I don't think I could have been any more clear with Santa when I told him, point blank on that late December weekend before Christmas in 1969 that I wanted a Marx Big Wheel. I even went so far as to tell him that there were other Big Wheels out there but the Marx Big Wheel was the one I wanted. 

 

 

Not the object of my childhood dreams 

 

So, Christmas morning when I found this fully assembled Martian tricycle under the Christmas tree I was most perplexed. My angst was two fold since growing up in John and Betty's fun-house, not showing extreme appreciation for something they did for us could get your head, feet and hands chopped off. Even on Christmas morning. What's more I knew that with this thing fully assembled, meaning my father had actually lifted a finger to do something and it being under the tree, there was no way I'd ever get my Big Wheel. My disappointment, as hard as I tried to hide it, was apparently palpable. "Well," said my mother incredulously as she took a long drag on her filter less cigarette and talking while blowing the smoke at me, "they were out of Big Wheels and the man said this was better because it's heavier since it's made of metal."  Although confused by her statement seeing that I asked Santa for a Big Wheel and not her, I was mortified and terrified at the same time. Through my tears I was able to squeak out a life saving, "Oh...it's cool!"  Save nothing for the fact that I knew then that Kris Kringle couldn't be trusted.

 

 

My X-15 looked very much like this one. I don't remember seat belts on mine; perhaps my father didn't install them. 

 

Late that Christmas day the X-15 sat gathering dust and my mother threw me out of the house demanding that I try it out. Obligingly, I carried the back breakingly heavy monster down our front stoop and onto the walkway. Fist thing it did was get stuck in one of the myriad cracks in the broken concrete slabs of our walk way. The bizarre rear steering of the X-15 doing little to help it get over the juts and ruts of that perilous ribbon of moon craters in the front of our house. The "joystick" slapping back and forth perilously close to my face and other personal equipment as I pedaled; I feared for my cheek bones and worse. What's more, a friend saw me pedaling this monument to weirdness and yelled, mockingly, to me, "Nice Big Wheel, Charley! Hahahahaha" My worst nightmares were coming true; I was drawing attention to myself and not the good kind. All I wanted to do was fit in and this thing was doing the opposite for me. The pain. Oh, the pain.

This X-15 looks like it was left out the rain one too many times

 

The Matell X-15 borrowed its name from from the NASA rocket plane that set numerous speed and altitude records in the 1960's. Like the Marx Big Wheel, the Mattel X-15 was direct pedal drive to the front wheel. The similarities ended there.

 

 

Rear steering for the sake of rear steering. There was no benefit.

 

Whereas the Marx Big Wheel is little more than a plastic tri-cyle and steered conventionally, the X-15's steering is by the rear wheels through a cantilevered A arm setup that banks the thing when you move the steering "joystick". The further you moved the stick the greater the bank. The banking increasing in proportion to the degree of turns helped to keep the rider upright.

 

 

My X-15 looked like this one because I never took care of it.

 

This thing flipped over quite easily at speed and that could be quite fun if you crashed onto grass from the sidewalk or street. Not so much fun if it was onto the sidewalk or street. Or a tree or a sign post. 

 

 

Ultimately, I have no idea what happened to my X-15

 

I never enjoyed standing out like a soar thumb riding the X-15 while everyone else rode their Big Wheels. I did appreciate, though how solid it was in comparison to the soft, flexible Big Wheel. However, once I found out how much fun this thing was to flip over on the big hill  behind my house, especially when it was snow covered, I was almost ok with the X-15. Almost.

 

I never did get my Big Wheel.

Parenting lesson taught; if your kid asks for something specific as a gift, nothing else will ever do.

.

 

1984 Mercedes Benz 380 SL - Some Things Never Change

 

Here's a gem from back in the day that looks as good today as it did back when it shiny and new. This 1984 380 SL looking even more spectacular given that it's based up here in car devouring North East Ohio.

 

I wouldn't have been surprised to have seen Florida plates on this baby let alone these older, vintage 2003 Ohio plates that I see a fair number of melting from rust. There is some sentiment up here that road salt, or brine, used in abundance to keep roads safe during winter months never goes away. It lies in wait the blacktop and cement bubbling to the surface whenever it rains spraying our unsuspecting cars with its rust making solution.

 

This masterpiece of German engineering is flawless. At least from what I can tell. These SL's have a reputation for rust and, again, given this is Cleveland, an old Benz in this shape is even more remarkable. The better the condition the more it's worth, of course. You don't see many of these around these days that are in bad shape. What's more, if you see one if great shape, like this one, it's most likely original. These SL's are very expensive to repair let alone restore.

 

 

She's only a 380 meaning she has a 3.8 liter V-8 making all of 155 horsepower. A Buick 3.8 liter V-6 of the same vintage put out only five less horses and similar torque. Albeit with far less smoothness in operation. SL stands for "sport" and "leicht" (light). Sport and light may have been true on older SLs. Our beauty here weighed in at more than 3500 pounds. Light by todays standards, a modern SL pushes down north of 4500 pounds, not so much by even 1984 scales.

 

 

 

Back in the '80s, nothing said "I got it" more than a Mercedes Benz SL. Some things never change.