I can't believe I've been doing this blog for as long as I have an I've never done one on the Ford Motor Company's late, great, ok, kind of great looking, personal luxury car, the Lincoln Continental Mark VIII. That oversight or automotive injustice gets resolved today as I dive into the sagging, inch deep end of the air suspension pool and do a soliloquy on them. Our lovely subject is a '94 for sale in Canton, Ohio. Might be twenty-eight years old but she's got only 64,000 or so miles on her digital ticker. Asking price, is, I wish it were three grand less, $8,995.
For simplicity and clarity's sake, if we define the personal luxury car as a uniquely American idiom, there were a number of luscious two-door luxury coupes out of Germany years ago, there were two succinctly different strata of them back in the day, as they say. You had your every man and woman Chevrolet Monte Carlo, Pontiac Grand Prix, Ford Thunderbird and the like and then there were the super-duper "PSL's". Cars like our Lincoln Continental Mark VIII here along with the Cadillac Eldorado and Lexus SC 300\400 (although a Japanese make and model, it was designed in the United States). Think of those cars like you would brand-new Tesla's today. So expensive they were out of the reach of proletariat slobs. You know. Folks like you and me.
If I thought the styling on the Mark VII bold, progressive and teetering on "aggressive", imagine what I thought of these things. First time I saw one I thought it looked like a cross between a Star Trek (TV show) and Goodfellas set piece. But it somehow works even if it appears at certain angles it's going to go completely wrong. Remarkably, despite this (ridiculous) vestigial spare-tire trunk hump that Ford (Lincoln) attempted to pass off as a spoiler, (isn't that hysterical?), and gigantic overhangs, it never does. At least through my foggy goggles. Then again, I'm a fan of this sliver of vehicle niche.
If the outside has a screaming '90's vibe, the interior is even worse. Or better based on your point of view or opinion. Back in the day this was state-of-the-art stuff and made the insides of a Cadillac Eldorado and Lexus SC appear staid, stuffy and dated. Today, check out the cabins on an Eldorado or SC of this vintage and they look refreshingly "classic". This get-up looks kitschy if not all out gimmicky by comparison. At least by 1994 Ford had the good sense to not "do digital" on the speed-o-meter and tach. Allegedly, the leather thrones on our '94 here have been reconditioned. They sure look comfy. That's real wood too. Wafer thin wood but it's the real deal.
Introduced for model year 1994, the Mark VIII was built off a chassis Ford internally code-named, "FN-10", which was a modified version of the "MN-12" chassis that underpinned the 1989 Ford Thunderbird and Mercury Cougar. Let's give the Ford Motor Company the benefit of the doubt they had a good reason why it took them five years after the launch of the MN-12 Thunderbird and Cougar to whip up the Mark VIII. I recall there being one but after thirty years, or so, I've forgotten what it is. Not like the Fox-body based Mark VII was selling that well.
So, why aren't I at least test driving this blue beauty? Well, first off, at just over an hour away, given a good thirty minutes to crawl all over it before I drive it, I'm past the point in my life where I'll drive a fairly significant distance to just "kick tires" on something I find interesting. And I do find this interesting if for no other reason it's still so "out-there" styling wise. I do wish it were closer and like I said less expensive. NADA guidelines peg this around $4,850 but this is a "post-Pandemic", used car market. Everything is overpriced. Even stuff that most classic car aficionados would steer far and away from. Part of me likes this. I mean, likes this a lot. Maybe if I'm within shouting distance of Canton I'll inquire about it but, again, it's really overpriced.
While not nearly as bad as the Cadillac Eldorado I drove last weekend, there's a lot of "stuff" to break on these cars and I'm afraid it would just go "poof" in my garage. Namely, the "computer managed fully independent air suspension", and speed-sensitive, variable assist power steering. There are coil-over kits available that are quite reasonable at around $600 or so out of the box. Unless you're dealing with a neighborhood garage, good luck finding a franchised shop that will install "customer bought parts". With that in mind, the swap to coils might run you the dark side of two-grand. Throw your back out. Be a man and do it yourself.
These don't drive especially "special" either. At least not as well to justify their original near $50,000 sticker price. If anything, they're the best execution of the original concept of whatever a personal luxury car was supposed to be and are as much of a throwback to yesteryear as the silly trunk hump. In my experience with "Eights", the steering is over boosted, numb if not dead on-center and there's very little road-feel. Sporty this car is not. This physically big "InTech" V-8 is smooth and responsive but with this much engine, you'd think it should be faster. And it burns premium too. Ouch. At least the "In Tech" has a better reputation than Cadillac's "Northstar".
The air suspension is cushy but combined with the blasé handling, these are pretty mundane cars. Just like that Eldorado last weekend. And for the record, it's not like driving my wife's (beloved) '95 Lexus SC400 rocks my world either. Our Lexus, however, does soothe and cajole my wife (and I) with a smooth, reassuring, refined manner. It's bullet proof build quality makes us feel like brainiac rock stars for buying it too. It's got a couple of electrical gremlins here and there but aside from that, that car is a rolling bank vault of dependability. We've had it three years and we've put almost thirty thousand miles on it, and it's never given us a single hiccup.
All this makes me wonder what the point of these super-PSL's was in the first place. Thier inflated sticker prices solidified their exclusivity but at the end of the day, their blasé road manners make me think "automotive Ron Burgandy" more than anything else. Personally, I get what these cars are about but it's hard to explain their appeal. Especially to a generation that wasn't even born yet. As if that matters but I hope you get my gist. You either "get" these cars or you don't. You ain't gotta do no explaining when it comes to why you're driving a $70,000 luxury cross-over. Except maybe how you can afford such a thing on such a modest income. Don't your kids need to eat?
Ford (Lincoln) sold these through 1998 doing a fairly major update for 1997. I prefer the 1994-1996 models. Your opinion may vary. See dealer for details. Cadillac soldiered on with their Eldorado through 2002. Lexus got out of the PSL business, well, the first time, after 2010.
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